The Infects Review

The Eulogy (From the Publisher): 
Seventeen-year-old Nero is stuck in the wilderness with a bunch of other juvenile delinquents on an “Inward Trek.” As if that weren't bad enough, his counselors have turned into flesh-eating maniacs overnight and are now chowing down on his fellow miscreants. As in any classic monster flick worth its salted popcorn, plentiful carnage sends survivors rabbiting into the woods while the mindless horde of “infects” shambles, moans, and drools behind. Of course, these kids have seen zombie movies. They generate “Zombie Rules” almost as quickly as cheeky remarks, but attitude alone can’t keep the biters back.

Serving up a cast of irreverent, slightly twisted characters, an unexpected villain, and an ending you won’t see coming, here is a savvy tale that that’s a delight to read—whether you’re a rabid zombie fan or freshly bitten—and an incisive commentary on the evil that lurks within each of us.

The Epitaph (In a Nutshell): A teen zombie comedy that tries to be ambitious with style, but ultimately becomes annoying.

Scary School Review

The Eulogy (From the Publisher): You think your school's scary? Get a load of these teachers:
"Ms. Fang," an 850-year-old vampire
"Dr. Dragonbreath," who just might eat you before recess
"Mr. Snakeskin"--science class is so much more fun when it's taught by someone who's half zombie
"Mrs. T"--break the rules and spend your detention with a hungry "Tyrannosaurus rex"
Plus:
Gargoyles, goblins, and Frankenstein's monster on the loose
The world's most frighteningly delicious school lunch
And
The narrator's an eleven-year-old ghost
Join Charles "New Kid" Nukid as he makes some very Scary friends--including Petunia, Johnny, and Peter the Wolf--and figures out that Scary School can be just as funny as it is spooky

The Epitaph (In a Nutshell): A frighteningly funny read for 8-12. One of the most hilarious and enjoyable books I've ever read.

Dearly Departed, 

We are gathered here today to discuss Scary School by Derek the Ghost AKA Derek Taylor Kent. I want to start this review with something that happened to me yesterday in the bookshop where I work. A man came in asking for something for his nine year old daughter to read. She loved The Witches by Roald Dahl (a very fine choice) but was having trouble finding something that was both dark and hilarious. Everything I showed him she’d either read (Philip Ardagh, Andy Griffiths) or wasn’t interested (Lemony Snicket). Eventually he walked away with Mysterious Benedict Society, but deep down I wasn’t really happy. I knew there was a book out there that would have been even better for her, but for the life of me I couldn’t think what.

Today, I sat down and read Scary School. I meant to spread it out over a couple of sessions, but I loved it so much that I put all my other work aside and finished it in one go. Spinechilldren, this book is hilarious. And terrifying. It is hilariously terrifying. And it is the perfect book for that nine year old girl. The next time I see her dad come in to the store, I am going to corner him and shove this in his face while shrieking incoherently about how awesome this book is. For the meantime, however, I hope I can coherently explain to you exactly why I loved this.

Scary School had me at hello, and the hello in question comes from Derek the Ghost, the book’s narrator, who reads your mind and compliments you on what an excellent name you have. He then goes on to introduce you to Scary School, where students die with alarming regularity (though this is okay, because they’ll usually be brought back to life as either a vampire or a zombie). Normally it’s the teachers doing the killing, from the lovely Ms Fang (who hardly ever kills any of her students) to the draconian Dr Dragonbreath, who ate almost an entire class on the first day.

And so we start to learn about the various comings and goings of the school as they prepare for the Ghoul Games, something akin to the Olympics for Scary kids and humans alike. Scary School reads more like a collection of short stories with constant callbacks and callforwards that help to weave all of the stories together into a complete novel. It’s a similar format to stories like Nanny Piggins by RA Spratt and Darth Paper Strikes Back by Tom Angleberger, two other favourites of mine, and I feel like in Scary School it works even better. When a new character or situation is mentioned, it will often be followed by ‘but more on that later’ which really made me want to keep reading to find out.

While I did adore the gory bits (which, delightfully, weren’t sanitised for the sake of the adults who might be reading over shoulders) it was the funny parts that stood out for me, and what will ultimately make this a huge hit for the 8-12 market, boys and girls. The humour ranges from wordplay to black comedy to wonderfully inventive back stories (ever wonder how Jason got his hockey mask and chainsaw?). If it had me waking my partner up at 6am this morning so I could tell him my favourite parts (the three Rachels – Rachael, Raychel and Frank, which is pronounced ‘Rachel’) it’s definitely going to get the intended audience excited.

Scary School has been out since June last year, so if you haven't snapped it up yet, what's wrong with you? And if I'm already preaching to the converted, Scary School 2: Monsters on the March comes out 26 June. To find out more, check out http://www.scaryschool.com/.

Review - Scream Street 1: Fang of the Vampire

The Eulogy (From the Publisher):
In Scream Street, Luke and his parents discover a nightmarish world of the undead. Luke soon makes friends with vampire Resus Negative and mummy Cleo Farr, but he remains determined to take his terrified parents home. After liberating the powerful book Tales of Scream Street from his new landlord, Otto Sneer, Luke learns that the founding fathers of the community each left behind a powerful relic. Collecting together all six is his only hope of opening a doorway out of the street, so with the help of Resus and Cleo he sets out to find the first one, the vampire’s fang. But with Otto Sneer determined to thwart him at every turn, will Luke even get past the first hurdle alive?

The Epitaph (In a Nutshell): An insanely fun start to what is an excellent comedy horror series for seven and ups.  

Dearly Departed,

We are gathered here today to discuss Scream Street 1: Fang of the Vampire by Tommy Donbavand. I always shake my head at people who say they don't like series. Are they crazy? Nothing makes me happier than encountering a new series with an excellent concept and knowing I'll be able to return to it again and again. Scream Street is one such series, about Luke Watson the werewolf, Rhesus Negative the vampire and Cleo Farr the mummy. They all live in Scream Street, home to all kinds of supernatural creatures like surfer zombies and farting goblins.

I loved this from cover to cover - the excellent characters, the escapades of the three main characters, and really, what's not to love about farting goblins? Scream Street really is the perfect book for kids aged seven and up who like a bit of ghoulish fun, and I can see myself recommending it over and over again. This is one series I'm really happy to have finally started on, and I can't wait to devour the rest of them.

Review - Hold Me Closer Necromancer

The Eulogy (From the Publisher): Sam leads a pretty normal life. He may not have the most exciting job in the world, but he’s doing all right—until a fast food prank brings him to the attention of Douglas, a creepy guy with an intense violent streak. 
Turns out Douglas is a necromancer who raises the dead for cash and sees potential in Sam. Then Sam discovers he’s a necromancer too, but with strangely latent powers. And his worst nightmare wants to join forces . . . or else.
 With only a week to figure things out, Sam needs all the help he can get. Luckily he lives in Seattle, which has nearly as many paranormal types as it does coffee places. But even with newfound friends, will Sam be able to save his skin?

The Epitaph (In a Nutshell): A hilariously dark YA read with great characters, great plot and one hell of an interesting world.

Dearly Departed
We are gathered here today to discuss Hold Me Closer Necromancer, by Lish McBride. When you read a lot of horror, it’s easy to get sucked into finding the scariest read, the goriest. Sometimes you can forget just how funny horror can be. Enter Hold Me Closer Necromancer, whose snappy dialogue and razor sharp characters had me laughing out loud.
That’s not to say it’s not without its dose of darkness too. HMCN has one of the most stone cold villains I’ve seen in a while – Douglas is less likely to cackle evilly as he is to fix you with a measured stare and slit your throat. In fact, all of the characters are brimming with personality, both heroes and villains, and points have to go to Sam for being one of the most genuinely likeable leads I’ve met in some time.
This was so much fun to read, and everything, from the writing to the plot to the world McBride has created are all pitch-perfect. And luckily there’s a sequel in the works too!

5 Skulls - A Killer Read